The $2 Haircut

As it goes, one will need haircuts throughout the year to maintain some resemblance to a kempt human being. With all the emphasis on screening out terrorists at the airport checkpoints these days, I figured it's best to stay well shaved and groomed when passing through customs. With my last haircut in Dubai 2.5 months ago, it was high time for another one.

We booked a hotel in Varanasi that, without being a 5 star dripping opulence resort, had a nice array of massage and salon services. Upon checking in, I was handed the salon services menu and noticed that a "gentleman's haircut" was 50 Rupees ($1.25). For that price, how could you go wrong? (I also noticed that a "gentleman's head shave was 60 Rupees) I thought the guy would take out the clippers, put on the #2 attachment and go to town. I was slightly mistaken.

As with most services that we encounter, you first must resist the up sell. When requesting the haircut, you're made aware of "this package deal" and "that special deal" which tries to lump in massages, facials, leg waxing, etc along with your basic haircut. Once they got the point that I was interested only in a hair cut, we had to clarify the issue of hair cut vs. head shave. To make sure they were on the same page with me, I pointed to my existing hair and made a shortening gesture with my fingers. I then pointed to my bald forehead and said "NO, not like this" They all laughed and we got down to business.

I sat down in the chair and the barber put the cloth on me, tucking it into my collar like they do in the states. He then proceeded to pull out the biggest, rustiest pair of scissors that I'd ever seen. These scissors were like those craft scissors everyone used in grade school, you know, the metal ones with the black painted handle that hurt your hand if you cut for extended periods of time. (If he missed, I was going to lose and ear or need a tetnus shot.) With the aid of two combs, he managed to work the hair shorter on one side of my head then the other, never stopping the cutting motion of the scissors, even when he wasn't cutting hair. It was like someone had plugged in his hand and not until the hair cut was over did he stop the "swish swish" of the scissors.

For the crudeness of tools he had to use, I got a dy-no-mite haircut. For the edges of my hairline, no electric trimmers were needed, he had a straight razor for that. The hair continued to come off as he finished a rough cut, then proceeded to go back and touch up certain areas he wasn't happy with. A true professional, I thought. When he finished up, I almost jumped out of the chair, but hesitated for a second. I'm glad I did, because he then proceeded to massage my scalp, face, shoulders, arms and hands for the next 15 minutes. Last, but not least, he picked up the scissors again and trimmed my ear hair. I chuckled, beacause that's what Zef used to do as the last part of a haircut back in Michigan. Zef also charges $25, this guy $1.25.

I tipped him and hopped down, pleased as punch at the bargain I'd found on my haircut. I might not be shopping for bargains on goods to take back with us to the states, but I felt like I'd found the bargain of the century on my haircut.

~S